Sunday, July 24, 2016

Is That You Behind Those Foster Grants?

The glasses company Foster Grant has brought back their great old campaign from the 1970s: “Is that you behind those Foster Grants?” Well, I think this slogan would be lots of fun to use in the context of horror and science fiction movies for an ad campaign for Halloween, or anytime, really: the public is crazy about horror and science fiction, in case you haven’t noticed. (It’s not just for Halloween anymore!)

We could see characters like Dr. Jekyll and then Mr. Hyde wearing Foster Grants, we could see the pod people from Invasion of the Body Snatchers wearing Foster Grants, we could see The Thing from Another World wearing Foster Grants (the original novella The Thing was based on was called: “Who Goes There?”), we could see Larry Talbot and then the Wolf Man wearing Foster Grants, etc. And each time the announcer asks: “Is that you behind those Foster Grants?”

This idea would also work for superheroes and their secret identities. We could see Clark Kent wearing Foster Grants, and a voiceover could ask: “Superman, is that you behind those Foster Grants?”

And we could see Darth Vader wearing his mask, and the evil Emperor asks: “Darth Vader: Is that you behind those Foster Grants?” And from The Force Awakens we could see Rey ask a masked Kylo Ren: “Kylo Ren: Is that yu behind those Foster Grants?” (Apparently Foster Grant makes all the lenses for evil Sith Lord masks.)

Also, for a joke ad using this slogan, we could see wanted criminals, people in witness protection, and defected Russian spies wearing Foster Grants. The police could ask a wanted fugitive: “Is that you behind those Foster Grants?” and after he says yes or tries to deny it, they arrest him. Mafia hit men could ask someone in witness protection who testified against their boss: “Is that you behind those Foster Grants?” and then kill him. And defected Russian spies could be asked by FSB assassins: “Is that you behind those Foster Grants?” and then stick a ricin pellet in their leg, or maybe serve them some polonium-garnished sushi.