Religious activists delivered a golden calf to House Speaker John Boehner on Thursday, claiming he is not “standing with Jesus”.
Really? A golden calf for not standing with Jesus? I love religious people who don’t know their Bible. The golden calf has nothing to do with Jesus, but thanks for playing! (You get some complimentary Turtle Wax as a consolation prize.)
Yes, um, the golden calf comes from the Exodus story, and as such is related more to Moses. Jesus was that guy who pushed over the money-changing tables in the Jerusalem Temple. I don’t think he was awarded a golden calf for doing so, but maybe that’s in the Apocrypha or something. But I understand that it can get confusing: Moses and Jesus are both important male biblical figures speaking for God, and they both have beards and stuff, so there’s that. They both have similar names too, with five letters, a vowel every other letter, two Ss, etc. And they’ve both had Hollywood blockbuster movies based on their lives.
But then again, I guess it’s too much trouble to overturn money-changing tables on Boehner: it might be viewed as an attack and get them pounced on by the Secret Service. But hey: how about presenting him with 30 pieces of silver? That might work, and it’s actually related to selling out Jesus. Or isn’t that a big-enough display for the cameras?
But you know, maybe they were actually thinking of The Golden Turkey Awards.
Here’s the biblical story:
