NORAD Tracking Santa

I see on the news that NORAD is tracking Santa Claus this Christmas Eve. During a government shutdown NORAD still gets funding for tracking Santa Claus, when other agencies do not get funded? Well, this really shows where our government's priorities lie: spying. They're tracking Santa Claus's activities, probably covertly via satellite. Do they have a warrant for this surveillance activity? They probably already know what Santa is bringing them for Christmas too, those cheaters. I want a congressional investigation!

Rudolph’s Rhinoplasty

In this (joke) ad for a (fictitious) plastic surgery office, we hear the part of the well-known song: “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” that goes:

Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer had a very shiny nose

And if you ever saw it you would even say it glows

All of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names

They never let poor Rudolph join in any reindeer games

Then the song continues with the altered lyrics:

Then Rudolph got a reprieve through plastic surgery

Rudolph’s nose now looks so good that he moved to Hollywood

Now all the reindeers love him and he stars in big movies

Rudolph the nose-job reindeer got Rudolph’s Rhinoplasty!

Then the announcer chimes in, saying: “Yes, Rudolph got his nose fixed, and you can too, at Rudolph’s Rhinoplasty!”