Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Bipartisan Monopoly: The Board Game

It’s Bipartisan Monopoly, the board game for the whole family! Play in teams against each other as Democrats and Republicans, and make sure to make election rules that disenfranchise third-party candidates so only a Democrat or a Republican can win! Next, make sure everyone thinks you all hate each other over partisan policy differences (even though you’re all the best of friends in real life) so the voters will all hate each other for your benefit. Then, run for Congress against each other: if you win, you win, and you make tons of corrupt money in government; and if you lose, you win, because then you can become a lobbyist and make tons of corrupt money with the government via all your friends in government! Then, run against each other again and switch places, making even more corrupt money in the process! It’s years of fun for the whole family! Everybody wins (except the American People and third parties) when you play Bipartisan Monopoly!