Saturday, July 25, 2015

Smiley Wipes

Are people always telling you to: "Wipe that smile off your face", but you can't, getting you into trouble? Then you need Smiley Wipes: the all natural way to wipe that smile off your face immediately, guaranteed!

Here's how it works: Smiley Wipes contains a very powerful numbing agent that relaxes those smile muscles immediately upon being wiped across the face. Side effects may include post-dentist-type drooling, loose lips that may sink ships, temporary trouble with speaking and swallowing, and bad breath.

When your hide depends upon removing that smile quickly, rely on the best smile remedy money can buy: Smiley Wipes! Clinically proven in comedy clubs and on political candidates during election campaign charm offenses!

That's Smiley Wipes: Wipe that smile off your face!

(The company that makes Bitter Yuck should consider making this for people.)

(I was watching some noir movie on TCM last night, and some tough guy character said to someone: "Wipe that smile off your face!" and it reminded me of all the times school bullies, teachers, my parents, etc., had said the same thing to me. But I couldn't always stop smiling, and I got in trouble. So that made me think of this product some people definitely need sometimes to wipe that smile off their face.)