I recently saw an ad recommending Botox for migraines. That sounds like a great idea. Botulinum toxin is the most lethal poison known to man, from what I understand, and so whatever excuse we can think of to inject ourselves with it, I’m for it! The world is overpopulated anyway, isn’t it? And seeing as how so many people are now having it injected for various and sundry purposes, wouldn’t it be the perfect murder weapon? Given the current hysteria over opioid medications for pain, surely we can kill whomever we want and then just blame the doctor. It’s all the rage nowadays to blame the doctor, and not consider the personal responsibility of the patient, so why not blame the doctors for this too?
Have a rich vain relative? Just tell them how wrinkley they look and suggest Botox! Oh, they don’t have migraines too? Then simply play Trout Mask Replica by Captain Beefheart and his Magic Band, or Entertainment by Gang of Four, while using strobe lights throughout their house, until they develop migraines, and then recommend Botox, and say it worked for yours (even if you never had them). Then just shoot them up with Botox while they’re asleep and collect all their money! (Oh, it’s all debts and tax liens? Well, don’t blame me: You’re the one who did it! I was only joking! And I’ll plead the fifth once I deny it all!)
