In this heart-wrenching animated film about loyalty and prejudice, a super-intelligent tampon is used by a woman with a genetic anomaly that holds the secret to curing a deadly disease on the verge of becoming an epidemic, and feeling love and loyalty to humanity for creating it, the now used super-intelligent tampon goes forth to try to tell the woman, her family, news reporters, and qualified doctors about the healing properties hidden within her blood before the deadly disease can claim more victims and become a pandemic; but, because it’s a used tampon, everyone is repulsed by it, and no matter what it tries to get its message across, it is rebuffed, repeatedly thrown into the trash, or flushed down a toilet. Undeterred, however, and seriously valuing the human lives in question, our heroic red tampon tries and tries until finally it manages to scrawl a message onto a pad on its user’s doctor’s desk in blood; but, thinking it a prank, the doctor asks the cleaners to wipe the message away, and he flushes the heroic tampon down the toilet again. And as a result, a large swath of humanity dies of what would have been a curable illness, and all because no one would listen to our heroic used tampon, despite its good intentions and wisdom, and only because it’s a used tampon. And so the moral is not to judge a book by its cover, for surely even a used tampon has something important to tell you no matter where you might find it.
That’s The Red Tampon: This tampon wants to be used for good!
(Gee, I wonder if Playtex might sponsor this movie, seeing as how a tampon is the hero trying to save countless lives. {No? Okay, fine. How about o.b.?})
