So I see the Cubs are playing the Mets for the pennant this
year. Surely this is a sign of the coming of the apocalypse! We all keep
hearing it’s coming soon and we’re living in the end times, but did you know
the signs are sports-related? I think I even remember the line from an
apocryphal Biblical text on the apocalypse:
When a pennant is played betwixt Cubs
and Mets,
The Apocalypse nigh in motion it sets.
Grab all the canned and powdered food you can carry and
hunker in your bunker if see you the next sign: a Super Bowl filled with Lions,
the last sign the end times are about to occur:
When a super-sized bowl with lions
is filled,
Know ye then all of mankind shall
be killed.
(I don’t think we have to worry about the Lions appearing in
the Super Bowl yet, though.)
