A satirical blog about media, marketing, advertising, politics, pop culture, etc. All references to actual companies, products, people, etc. is for the purpose of parody. All writing is copyright by Greg Medernach, and is mostly intended as absurdist humor, and as a portfolio of comedy and creative advertising material. Questions and Comments: unconditionedresponse@yahoo.com
Saturday, October 31, 2015
Crest Whitestrips Vampire Ad (Proposed)
Two
attractive young women with backpacks are hiking up to a spooky old castle on a
hilltop at night with a full moon and lots of fog swirling around. They walk
across a drawbridge and through a large entryway, finding themselves in a dark,
massive banquet hall. One of the women is amazed and fascinated by the
surroundings and wants to explore, while the other is nervous and frightened
and wants to leave. Suddenly a vampire in a black cape emerges from behind the
timid woman and growls, baring his fangs. She shines her flashlight in his face
and screams. The vampire’s teeth are very brown and yellow in color. After
screaming, the timid woman cries: “Eewww! Look at his teeth!” The other woman
says to the vampire: “Yuck! You should be ashamed of yourself! Don’t you ever
brush!?” In an insert of a product shot, the announcer says: “Scaring people
with your ugly, yellow teeth? You don’t need to go to a dentist to get
beautiful, sparkling white teeth! With Crest Whitestrips, you can get the
whitest teeth in the comfort of your own home.” Back at the castle, we see the
vampire smiling with very white teeth in a closeup. As we zoom out, we see that he has his arms around both of the young
women, who both now have vampire teeth. One of the women looks at his teeth and says: “See? Much better!”
The vampire says: “You really think so?” And the other woman looks and says: “Totally!”