We are spending so much money that even the budget cuts that congress is debating will only lessen the escalating debt by a tiny bit, or what economists refer to as a “smidge”. But look at what we’re spending our money on: super-elite military groups, stealth planes, spy drones, ultra-technological super-weapons, and yes, those awesome nukes! We can’t cut the military budget, but we’re never allowed to use most of what we’re spending the money on anyway. I have an idea that will both let us use our super-ultra-ninja military stuff and save the economy and solve the debt crisis all at the same time! That’s right: we use our special forces guys to use all of our super-stealthy tech weapons and surveillance equipment to rob and clean out all the major banking houses in all the countries of the world, then we threaten them with our nuclear weapons not to say anything about it, and then they can just print up more of their money to replace what we’ve stolen, and no-one will be any the wiser. And if anyone starts to suspect, we can invade Libya or something and say: “Hey, look over there!” Problem solved.
