So these new dolls are like the regular Bratz dolls, which are basically like Barbie Dolls for Kim Kardashian fans or something, only now they also have like furry tails and stuff, and I guess they cough up hairballs from time to time. These must have been genetically engineered by scientists who were tired of having to wait all day to use the bathroom (because their daughters were always in there forever), so they spliced the DNA of a normal, superficial, hyper-entitled American tween girl with a cat, so the new girls would just use a litterbox and lick themselves clean like a cat, thus finally allowing their parents to use the bathroom again. (Yea, science! Now if they can only find a way to give them telepathy so parents can save money on cell-phone and texting bills.)
But the ad says they're Bratz by day and cats by night. Um, what does that mean, exactly? During the day they're insufferable snobs and brats, but at night they're foraging through trash cans and chasing rats through alleys and stuff? Are they killing birds and mice and leaving them on their welcome mats for their mothers to find? And do they all wrestle around and scratch each other all night like cats do? I'm just curious, because my sister has three cats, and they just seem to sleep all day, and then fight and hunt for things at night. Maybe it's more glamorous if you're a cat or something, but it doesn't seem to fit the fashionista image all that well. But I guess at least they didn't cross-breed them with dogs: yet. (Although, with dog shows and people dressing their little dogs up in silly clothes and stuff, perhaps it would be more appropriate to splice the Bratz DNA with show toy dogs.)
Here's this silly ad, over-produced and nauseatingly super-slick (like a vapid music video):
