Thursday, April 17, 2014

California Replaces Easter Bunny with Playboy Bunny

In an effort to prevent Californians from being oppressed by Christianity, the Easter Bunny is being replaced. First it was going to be called the Spring Bunny, but with it hosting an egg hunt, everyone knew it was still the Easter Bunny, since that’s the only bunny that sponsors egg hunts.

So, thinking to distract everyone, California decided to call the bunny the Playboy Bunny, and this bunny would sponsor a breast implant hunt. After all, breast implants are sort of round and look a bit like gelatinous eggs, so it’s sort of similar; plus, kids can save them for later use, seeing as how it’s California (boys can squeeze them, and girls can save them for when they get their boob job).

Of course, this selection has ruffled some feathers, with some claiming it’s sexist and even less appropriate to have a pornographic mascot replacing a religious one. But they’re just spoiled sports, so nobody’s listening to them.