In this commercial for Centrum Silver, the announcer says
these are vitamins for our eyes, heart and brain. Then he says the slogan:
“Centrum Silver: for the most amazing parts of you.” Um, excuse me? What about
the ass? Is he saying our asses are not at least one of the most amazing part
of us? Wow, what an insult! And what about our faces? Are they saying we’re
ugly? And what about the rest of our bodies? Is he saying we’re fat,
out-of-shape and repulsive? Why, I’ve never been so insulted in my whole life!
But he’s probably not talking about me anyway; in fact, I
heard he’s talking about the rest of you. Well, I wouldn’t take that kind of
insult if I were you! I think maybe you should stop buying Centrum vitamins for
insulting us all (except me). Just kidding; I know he was talking about me,
trying to insult me! Well, I’ll get him…! (Just kidding.)
I’ll bet what happened is that this guy had a crush on a woman
who “had an ass that just wouldn’t quit”, but she rejected him, so he conspired
to get revenge with this ad that would so offend her ass that it would quit, so that if he couldn’t have
it, no one could.
Well, who knows: maybe it worked. But to go through all that
trouble of making vitamins just to try to get revenge through some convoluted
advertising ploy, and one that harms so many other people’s body parts’ egos, I
just don’t know if it was worth it in the end. But maybe he thinks so. And if he thinks so, then shouldn’t we, just to be neighborly?
Here’s the silver slander spot:
