Yes, it’s the Paramour Parachute: savior of city-dwelling
cheating spouses!
How many times has this happened to you? You’re with your
married lover at her high-rise apartment, 30 stories up in the air, when her
husband comes home unexpectedly…! This is New York City, where apartments are
small and efficient, and there’s nowhere to go, nowhere to hide, and her
husband is big and strong and tough and jealous. Well, Ashley Madison may have
helped you get yourself into this situation, but they can’t help you out now!
There’s nothing you can do…!
But now there’s the Paramour Parachute: the urban escape
system for cheating spouses!
Yes, running for the elevator naked with a bloody nose is a
thing of the past when you buy the Paramour Parachute! At the first sign of
trouble, simply slip on the one-piece bodysuit and leap out the window: the Paramour
Parachute will do the rest, deploying a parachute and gliding you safely to the
ground. (Warning: you must be at least 20 stories up to use, and avoiding traffic
on the ground is your problem.)
That’s the Paramour Parachute: ask for it by name wherever cheating supplies are sold!
