Saturday, January 21, 2017

Hemorrhoid Medication Toby Keith Joke Ad

Toby Keith sang, on the National Mall on Thursday evening: “We’ll put a boot up your ass, it’s the American way!”

Now, it seems to me that would make for a good hemorrhoid medication TV commercial. He’d sing those lines from his song: “Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue”, and the announcer says: “Yes, it’s the American way to put a boot up your ass. And when you get an American boot put up your ass, use (whatever brand of hemorrhoid medication): the only brand that’s FDA approved for the treatment of ABUYAS (American Boot Up Your Ass Syndrome).

This is Toby Keith performing: “Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue” on the National Mall on Jan. 19, 2017 (The line I’m referring to is at about 2:45):

(Yes, now I see it’s actually a boot in your ass, but I like a boot up your ass better, so I’m leaving it. After all, ABYUAS sounds like BOOYAH, so it sounds funnier to me. My apologies to all you perfectionists out there.)

And follow-up ads could show militants in other countries showing up at Red Cross centers with a boot sticking out of their ass, and they ask the doctors what to do about it, and they say to use the product the ad is for, the only product known to successfully treat the signs and symptoms of ABUYAS.