There’s a new Fifty
Shades of Grey sequel coming out soon called: Fifty Shades Darker. I was hoping they’d call it Fifty-One Shades of Gray, or 50–2 (or Fifty—Two). But I guess Fifty
Shades Darker has a kind of ring to it.
I read the plot of this upcoming movie, and it’s not what I
was hoping for. But maybe in the next installment of this franchise, or at
least in the last one, we can finally see the movie we deserve to see.
In the sequel I’d like to see, Christian Grey finds he
cannot live without Anastasia Steele, so he finds her and proposed to her. She
accepts on the condition that he not subject her to sadomasochism or bondage
practices anymore unless she asks him to, which she never intends to do.
And so Christian and Anastasia get married. And Anastasia
never requests the sadomasochism Christian so desperately desires. Instead, she
gets pregnant, has a baby girl, and is so devoted to her brand new child that
she ignores Christian altogether, choosing to be a stay-at-home mom for her
daughter.
Frustrated at not having his sadomasochistic or bondage
needs met, and having a new sexy secretary, he begins a torrid SM/bondage
affair with the new secretary. Apparently this power trip sexual dominance over
an underling at work is the only thing that gives our hero any manner of sexual
satisfaction or emotional feelings of affection whatsoever. And so we spend
most of the movie watching a rerun of the first movie in an overindulgent and
unnecessarily graphic series of sex scenes, with all the rampant nudity and
dirty talk we can handle.
So what happens is that Anastasia finds out about the affair
due to behavior cues and certain smells and such that remind her of her initial
relationship with Christian. And so Anastasia asks Christian for a
sadomasochistic sexual experience; but first she asks him to build them a
secret fortified, soundproofed room in their home for that purpose where nobody
could possibly hear them or walk in on them while they’re getting their
perversions on and such. (They have a live-in nanny to help Anastasia with
raising their daughter and a permanent housekeeper to keep their enormous
mansions and apartments squeaky clean, you see.)
And so Christian has the secret room constructed just as
Anastasia had requested, and when it’s completed, they go there for another
session of pain and pleasure. This time, however, Anastasia requests to be the
dominant partner, and Christian agrees. And so Anastasia ties Christian up with
ropes using nautical knots that are unable to be undone and become tighter the
more he squirms around. And after tying him up, she reveals that she knows
about the affair he’s having with his new secretary, and she whips him hard
with an actual bullwhip until he’s covered in wounds. Then she exits and locks
the room, camouflages the entrance to the room, and walks away. The End.
(I have never seen Fifty Shades of Grey, so my apologies if
I got anything wrong.)
