In a commercial for Lear Capital, an announcer tells us that paper money is becoming worthless due to the overprinting of money, but not to worry, for you can buy gold! And gold will never lose its value like paper money, because “you can’t print more gold”!
Really? They can’t print or otherwise make more gold? Can’t they just get Rumpelstiltskin to spin more gold for them out of straw whenever they want some? All they have to do is promise him their first born. And for venal, greedy, gold-hoarding misers like these guys, surely this isn’t such a big deal. After all, you can always make more kids, but as they helpfully pointed out at the beginning of this spot, you can’t make more gold!
Actually, maybe that’s why they have so much of it to sell. Apparently, their place is so lousy with gold that they’ll do anything to get rid of it: even accept worthless paper money for it! So something funny must be going on! Hey, maybe they've got Rumpelstiltskin chained up in their basement? You never know!
The ad runs a lot on Fox News (surprise!), but I can’t find it on the Internet. But you can see it on Fox News, so watch Red Eye! (3:00 am EST, midnight PST.) It's really fun and funny, so long as you can take a conservative view of things. Watch it after The Daily Show and The Colbert Report just to laugh at both sides of the issues.
Here’s the Rumpelstiltskin story, for those who have forgotten it:
