In the last debate, Rick Perry said that if anyone doesn’t support his policy of giving in-state tuition to children of illegal immigrants, “I don’t think you have a heart.” Well, this didn’t sit well with conservatives who oppose illegal immigration, and it has cost Perry in the recent polls: he’s no longer the front runner. He’s sent people around all the news shows lately to tell everyone how nobody is tougher on illegal immigration than Rick Perry, and that nobody has done more to defend the border then Rick Perry, but still this may not be enough.
But I think I know how he could win back that conservative support: through a new TV ad that shows how tough he is on both illegal immigration and border security at the same time! How could he do it, you might well ask? Well, it’s simple! This is what that commercial would look like:
The setting is the desert along the Texas/Mexico border. The border is painted as a line across the dirt, and it says “America” on one side of the line, and “Mexico” on the other side. Along that line stand a line of about 10 to 12 Mexicans dressed as illegal immigrant migrant worker types, and they all stand just on the American side of the border line. So then Rick Perry walks into frame and says (in that great Texas drawl): “I’m Rick Perry, and this is my border policy!” Then he walks down the line of Mexicans, pushing each one, one after the other, across the border line on the ground and into Mexico, with each one of them landing on their butt on the Mexican side of the border line. Then Perry turns toward the camera, he’s given a close-up, and he says: “I’ll secure the border, and I’ll get rid of all them ill-legal immigrants! And if you don’t vote for me, I don’t think you have a brain!”
See? It can’t miss! If he does that, he’s practically elected already!
