Friday, October 18, 2013

Godzilla (2014)

Yes, we all know Godzilla, the gigantic dinosaurish creature purportedly created by atomic radiation. And we also know there’s a new movie reboot of Godzilla coming out next year. And we all know there’s got to be a twist to make it new, so here’s my guess as to how the upcoming movie will do it: Godzilla will be created as usual by atomic radiation, but this time, it’s all a plot by nuclear scientists to create a giant monster to attack their city and scare everyone away so the scientists can hope to acquire convenient, affordable parking that’s close to where they work, and also to drive down apartment rents such that they can afford to live in the city, rather than commuting miles and miles every day in thick rush hour traffic. And every sequel will be when the traffic and prices for parking and living spaces go through the roof again, and they have to create another giant monster to drive people away from the city again (or simply use mind control to make the previous Godzilla attack again).