Hey kids, it’s Politician, the video game that teaches you how to be a successful politician through its game play! With Politician, players will learn how to make it in the turbulent and sleazy world of politics! Here’s how it works:
Politician players each select a politician character to play, and they must promise unrealistic promises they never intend to keep, lie constantly, distort everyone else’s positions, demonize opponents, smear everyone who disagrees with them, pander to every special interest group (and the news people), threaten and blackmail anyone who might reveal potentially embarrassing information about their character or their staff, make corrupt back-room deals to get large corporate donations (and screw over the public by implementing the quid pro quo), clutter everyone’s emails with spam to solicit for donations, go to every city at the worst possible time and tie-up traffic for hours with unnecessarily overbearing security, talk over everyone on news shows, begin and cover-up torrid affairs and father/carry & give birth to love children, etc. Pretty soon, the whole family will be taking credit for chores they didn’t do and blaming each other for anything that goes wrong in the house: It’s hours of fun for the whole family learning how to cheat and win in the real world!
Plus, for added excitement and realism you can’t get anywhere else, Politician uses a special game controller, with game-specific controls like the “pander button”, the “smear button”, the “solicit donations button”, the “lie button”, the “finger-of-blame button”, the “obstruct button”, the “cover-up button”, etc., so that players can feel like they’re really living the life of a bona fide politician!
That’s Politician, the video game: Order yours today, and learn how to thrive in the seedy world of politics!
