Yes, Hollywood police are reopening the Natalie Wood case. But since they have already said that Robert Wagner is not a suspect, and everyone else has an alibi, that leaves only one person left who had opportunity in that open-water setting: Aquaman. The problem for police is that Aquaman will be very hard to trap as the perpetrator of this crime: he could have peer-pressured some fish or other sea creature to kill her using telepathy, and we could never prove it because they’ve probably already been eaten as sushi by now! (There are a lot of sushi places in Hollywood! I’m surprised they haven’t served Aquaman yet! Or have they? Police can’t find him for questioning, so you never know!)
But I contend this is all media persecution: Aquaman is innocent!
Here’s the story:
Or was it the ACLU who sought to silence Wood after she convinced people Santa Claus was real in Miracle on 34th Street? That made it way harder to ban manger scenes for years to come! Could she have been the first casualty of the brutal War on Christmas?
