I’m not sure why, but ever since seeing Close Encounters of the Third Kind again lately I have been
thinking about how the movie could have ended differently. Remember how these
science nerds and government dignitaries were all hanging around waiting for
the aliens to land, and they communicated with them with the wimpy five notes
of music from some crappy synthesizer? Well, with that kind of underwhelming
achievement, it’s no wonder aliens are always invading Earth and abducting
everyone all the time! No, if we really wanted to impress them that we were a
respectable culture, shouldn’t we have met them with a more impressive musical
communiqué?
No, if that really happened in real life, surely we’d greet
the alien menace with something more magisterial, like a full orchestra
accompanying Yngwie Malmsteen blasting out some classically-themed power metal
stuff, right? So the orchestra would be blaring some bombastic Wagnerian stuff,
and on top of it all,Yngwie would be shredding some bitchin’ solo at light
speed. And surely that would impress the saucer crowd, right? Oh, but I guess with
Earth’s luck with aliens, they’d probably perceive it as a threat (or else
they’d be jealous that they couldn’t outplay Yngwie), and then they’d destroy
the Earth! But hey, at least it would be a good pyrotechnic show to go with the
power metal show, huh? (And it would be free!)
