Yes, it’s the Olympics again, and in the coverage, we keep
hearing the phrase: “one of the most decorated Olympians”. And this idea of the
decorations made me think of something. Wouldn’t it be fun if NBC hired some
titan of the fashion world to come and critique the decorations? They could
have the most decorated Olympians walk out like in a runway fashion show with
all of their hardware, while the critic talks about the aesthetics of the
decorations. Like, he might say: “Yes, he’s the most decorated, but is he
really the most tastefully decorated? I
mean, look at all these medals hanging around his neck: it makes him look
arrogant and tacky, like one of those gauche braggadocio rappers from the ‘90s
with the too much ‘bling’ look. And just look at those medals: all that gold, silver and bronze; I mean, they all clash with one another! Pick one color for
your jewelry, please! And look at those ribbons: they’re all different bright
flashy colors! I mean, it’s a disaster! Why not just wear one: it’s simple,
elegant, and it looks so much more tasteful and modest, doesn’t it? Sometimes less is more, you know what I mean? The hodge-podge of styles and colors is just too busy to be pleasing to the eye. Simplicity is key here, otherwise it’s just too busy.”
Oh, but then it could turn out that this critic was a former
Olympian who is mad that he only won one medal, so he’s jealous, and he’s
trying to make it seem lame to win lots of medals.
