In this, the Holiday Season (Holiday = Holy Day), as usual, I
am inundated by religious references and people referencing the Bible. And when
I hear the many unbelievable stories from the Bible, I am reminded of the irony that the
word “Bible” sounds a lot like: “Buy Bull” (< buy, as in believe; and bull,
as in bullsh!t).
(BTW: I am not anti-religion, and I am not an atheist. But
you must admit, there are some
stories in the Bible that are a bit hard to swallow. I mean, take the guys
living 500 years. After 90, they’d look like the old version of Dustin Hoffman
in Little Big Man. And then they’d live another 410 years? I am not sure that was not intended as a
punishment. I mean, there wasn’t even any Icy Hot, Preparation H, Geritol, Boniva,
Flomax, AndroGel or Viagra yet back then. What was their quality of life like?
And did they look like Skeletor or Mumm-Ra by then? {Hey, maybe that’s why
Skeletor and Mumm-Ra are so angry: they’ve been alive too long and are not
allowed to die before they suffer great physical pains, constantly interrupted
sleep, erectile dysfunction, and low urine flow symptoms for hundreds of years.
No wonder they’re not nice to the young, fit, optimistic people they meet!
They’re like Clint Eastwood in Gran Torino
after a few hundred more years of lonely, angry grizzledom.})
