Have you ever noticed how a president’s hair turns white within a few short years of being the president? It happened to Clinton, (W.) Bush, and now Obama. It’s like they have the opposite of Just for Men Hair Dye in the White House. Maybe they’re hiding cartridges of it in the shower heads there or something? It just looks like they walk into the White House, and then they get Liquid Paper dumped on their heads! But then again, maybe that’s why it’s called “The White House”: It’s about hair color! Because it turns everyone’s hair white! And they only paint the building white to match the president’s hair so nobody will notice! It’s like the Haunted Mansion: They only call it that and have all those holograms and that ride so nobody will notice that it’s really haunted! That might scare everyone away, so they call it haunted so nobody will think twice when they see real ghosts! Such is obviously the case with the naming of the White House! Then maybe nobody will notice that it gives its (p)residents white hair! (Hey, maybe it’s also ghosts! That always happens in the movies when people see ghosts, right? So maybe it’s haunted too! And that's why their hair is white!)
Or, maybe to make some extra money, the government could make a reverse version of Just for Men Hair Dye that makes your hair look white! Then they could have commercials that say women always desire experienced, older men because they’re always successful and mature! (Especially now that there’s Viagra!) And then they could sell bottles of white paint and pretend they’re hair dye! Um, I mean, then you could make out like the president! (And maybe Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky could do the ads! Don’t like that idea? Then elect Newt Gingrich! All those Clinton jokes will disappear overnight once Newt Gingrich is the president!)
