Kids love the Pixar Cars movie, but so do adults! So then why do kids get all the branded products? We adults should get some Cars branded products too! Like, for instance, liquor:
Cars Brand Rum: Ads show cars drinking it, and they rev their engines, saying: “Rum! Rum! Rum!” (Cars ask for it by name, like cats do Meow Mix!) It’s the rum that ups your RPMs!
Cars Brand Lightning McQueen’s White Lightning: Lightning McQueen’s signature moonshine! Its “high octane” formula will supercharge your party’s horsepower!
Cars Brand Race Fuel Alcohol: Grain neutral spirits raring to go, with a rip-roaring 160 proof alcohol level so you can race into drunkenness at top speed!
Mater’s Radiator Fluid: American Absinthe Verte that’s the same color as antifreeze: it’s sure to break the ice and rev up any party!
Come on Pixar, you know we want the Cars liquor! After all, that’s how NASCAR developed in the first place: moonshine runners trying to outrun the feds! So it’s only right that you should sell Cars brand liquor!
(P.S.: Don’t drink and drive!)
(P.S.: Don’t drink and drive!)
