(I’m not a Republican, this is just an intellectual exercise based on their current policy arguments. And I will write plenty of ads for the Democratic Party once the Republicans are in charge again, just wait and see. But FYI: I don’t like either party, and neither should you.)
Bruce Wayne wants to develop the high-tech equipment he needs to become a force for justice in Gotham City as Batman, but higher taxes and more regulations on his business make it so he can’t do the necessary research nor get the necessary materials to build what he must build in order to dominate the forces of evil in his city. And so the super villains conquer Gotham City, and every time Batman tries to stop them, he gets his ass kicked; and they would kill him, but they find it amusing to beat him up and wait for him to come back for more. But just as they get really evil, the IRS audits Mr. Wayne for donations he made to a Republican Party candidate at some point, so he’s busy dealing with that when Bane destroys the city with a nuke (!).
Oh, the humanity. If only you had voted Republican: then all the unfair tax breaks for the rich and all the lobbying against corporate regulations would have helped Batman defeat the evil. But you wanted fairness, so it’s your funeral: you can be buried in a mass grave like everyone else who Batman would have saved if not for Democrats. (Of course I am being a smart-ass here. But Batman would make for good Republican political ad source material: he
* Okay, maybe they don’t all help others with their money, but what, you expect everyone to be a superhero? This is advertising, you don’t have to tell the whole truth! (Or any, actually.)
