Monday, September 15, 2014

How Dr. No Got His Name

Dr. No (before he is known as “Dr. No”) is trying to put his kids to bed, but they don’t want to go to sleep, so they ask him if they can stay up, and he says: “No!” Then his kids want to go see a cool movie, and they ask if they can go, and he says: “No!” Then his kids come home from school and find Dr. No playing around with his nuclear materials in a white lab coat, and they ask him: “Does that white coat mean you’re a doctor?” And, annoyed, he says: “No!” But then he drops something, and there’s an explosive chain reaction, burning his hands, and killing his children. And in memory of them, and his constant “No!” answers to them, when asked by SPECTRE what his moniker is, he calls himself: “Dr. No”.

(Also, an alternate explanation of his name could be that he was a regular medical doctor, but all his patients were hypochondriacs, drug addicts, etc., and so whenever anyone asked him to remove their pancreas, he’d say: “No”, and whenever someone would ask for a prescription for heroin, he’d say: “No”; and eventually his patients, all well-connected high society types, complained that he wasn’t doing what they wanted, so he was struck off. And in revenge, he joined SPECTRE, under the name his patients referred to him as: “Dr. No”.)