Sunday, September 23, 2012

Coursera

I heard about Coursera on NPR. It's a way to take online courses free of charge from some of the best colleges and universities in America. They were saying it might cheapen the college brands, or make people less likely to want to go to the college, but I really feel I must point out that this is nothing like going to actual college at all. Unless there's a subjective camera, and it keeps looking at other stuff around the room (like girls, or doodles in its notebook), or unless someone sitting next to the camera is constantly telling jokes, making fun of the professor, etc., then it's really nothing like actually going to college.

But you know, if they did that, where the person could take the class for free online, but they couldn't hear half the lecture, or the camera was constantly distracted, maybe it would whet people's appetite for more, and everyone would go to the real college to see the whole lecture (and then find out that real life is just like the online course, where you miss a lot due to talking, distractions, daydreaming, etc.).

But if they want to make it really feel like college, they have to have some characters show up on screen after the online course, and peer-pressure the online student into drinking beer bongs until they throw up. Then it could make the webcam take secret photos of the online student yawning, picking their nose, etc., and put it on Facebook. Then it might start to feel like real college!

Oh, and you know what else might help? If online colleges had virtual sports teams! So people who go to online schools could crowd around their screens on weekends and watch their make-believe, virtual football team play some video game football game. And maybe it could even be a multi-player online video game of whatever sport it is, so that online students could become virtual jocks and sports heroes, and get a varsity letter to put on their online avatar.