I’m afraid I was too busy watching the political conventions
to comment on this old story, but it turns out that the Social Security
Administration spent lots of money on hundreds of thousands of rounds of
hollow-point bullets recently, and I think I know why. They must know that
Social Security is unsustainable, and since we don’t have cool laser guns yet,
they had to make due with bullets. For what, you ask? Well, for the Carousel,
of course!
What’s the Carousel? It’s the way people who got too old
were ritualistically killed in Logan’s Run.
(They killed them at 30 in the movie, but I guess the government might allow
people to get to 70. If you’re nice.) That’s right, old people: they can’t find
the money they promised you (because they already spent it on other stuff), so
your days are numbered! Unfortunately you won’t get to wear hockey goalie masks
and get shot with laser beams. But if you want to resist, maybe you could wear
hockey masks and attack everyone with a machete like Jason from
Friday the 13th. And maybe it could be a
new reality TV show! You know, like The Hunger Games, but with old people fighting for their lives
against young people. You know it would be awesome!
Here’s the bullet-riddled story:
And here’s the Carousel, from Logan’s Run:
