I’ve just seen a screener of War Horse, and I think it will probably be a big hit. But you know, while it glorifies courage and all that, I’m not so sure it’s as zeitgeisty as it could be. It will probably resonate with families of returning Iraq War troops, but it fails to connect with the 99% of the Occupy protest movement. But that’s okay, because every hot movie needs a sequel, and I’ve got just the sequel for War Horse: Peace Horse!
Peace Horse will be a descendent of the original War Horse, but he’ll have relocated to the United States (his parents having emigrated as race horses or something like that), and after being raised on civil rights protests and rock and roll music and such, when he’s called up to serve in a cavalry regiment in Vietnam (yeah, yeah: the US Army probably didn’t use horses in combat in the Vietnam War, but this is a movie, so you have to suspend your disbelief and stuff.), he burns his draft card, runs away to Canada to escape the draft, and he changes his identity, sneaking back into the United States and following his dreams to San Francisco just at the right time to take part in the “Summer of Love”. So our equine friend falls in with a bunch of hippies, tie-dyes his fur, braids his mane and tail, drops acid, has a big peace sign branded onto his backside, and protests the war in between love-ins and Jefferson Airplane concerts.
Are you listening Steven Spielberg? We could make a fortune off the protest movement! An anti-war protesting animal, fighting for both human and animal rights? It can’t miss! Your next instant classic is: Peace Horse!
