Nike Basketball Kobe System Dominate Ad

I just saw a commercial on the NFL Network with Kobe Bryant doing a seminar presentation for all these famous champions, and he's telling them they have to dominate everything: dominate retirement, dominate art, dominate breakfast, dominate the galaxy, dominate this, dominate that, etc. So he's teaching all these winners how to dominate everything, but I can't help but remember how he got dominated in another court besides basketball: the divorce court. So, is he so obsessed with dominating everything after being dominated in divorce court? I have to wonder, and the timing of this ad campaign couldn't be worse for bringing this suspicion to mind, because the news stories of his ex-wife's huge divorce settlement were just big news very recently.

So at the end of this ad, I was expecting one of the guys in the audience to say to Jerry Rice (the guy who says he doesn't get it): "He's been obsessed with dominating everything ever since he got dominated in the divorce court." (And you know, they don't make shoes that can help with divorce court domination!) And then, just to rub it in, they could have the tag of this ad show Kobe being picked up by a limousine from the seminar location, and as they drive away, Kobe says: "Hey, this isn't the way to the basketball arena!" And the driver of the limo says: "I know. I'm your ex-wife's divorce lawyer; I'm taking you to the cleaners!"

And then they could make a whole ad campaign around this basketball court vs. divorce court idea, with the first ad showing Kobe destroying opposing teams with his 40-plus-point games, and they could have him say: "Being dominated in divorce court makes me want to dominate even more on the basketball court!" And then they could have another ad that has Kobe facing off against his ex-wife's divorce lawyer, where half of the court is a basketball court, and the other half is a divorce court, and they could show him battling this guy and his team of paralegals. And for the next ad, they could show Kobe destroy this guy on a basketball court (the lawyer being dressed in a suit with dress shoes), and after defeating the lawyer by a score of 100-0, Kobe could say: "They don't make shoes that help in divorce court, but out here on the basketball court, Nike shoes rule!"

I don't mean to be hitting Kobe below the belt here, by the way. But this ad really reminded me of the whole astronomical divorce settlement story (and that picture of the galaxy just rubbed in the whole "astronomical" part!), and it's the timing of it that's doing it more than anything. Plus there's the whole basketball court vs. divorce court thing (because they are both courts), so it's hard not to think of it. And after all, California is a community-property state, so the super rich should really consider staying single here!

Here's the dominant spot:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCLKhauUYi4

BTW: Later on Kobe and his wife reconciled, I think, so I am happy to report all of these jokes I made here are not referencing real bones of contention for Kobe, one of my city's greatest sports heroes.