Friday, January 27, 2012

Verizon LG Spectrum 4G R2D2 Ad

This commercial for the LG Spectrum shows how some sales guy sells a customer on the LG Spectrum 4G smartphone, rather than on buying R2D2 instead. They list the differences, but only in the way that the smartphone is better than R2D2 (!). They show us how the smartphone can play a movie (Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace, coincidentally) on it’s little teensy screensy, but they neglect to mention that R2D2 could show it to you in an awesome 3-D hologram, which would be way cooler! (Never mind the fact that if you had R2D2, you’d actually be living the Star Wars saga yourself! And that kicks any stupid little smartphone’s butt-dialer completely!) Plus, they say stuff like that the smartphone is easier to carry since it fits in your hand, but they neglect to mention that you could ride around on top of R2D2, as he’s got little jets to fly around, as well as wheels to roll around on, so you could go anywhere you wanted to with ease! Plus, the salesman dishonestly claims R2D2 needs a starfighter, which is a complete and outright lie! But if you have a starfighter, R2D2 can totally help you in tons of ways to fly it and fix it, plus get you out of all kinds of jams in addition, like shutting down trash compactors you’re stuck in, etc., as well as help you find princesses to rescue whenever you want to feel heroic. And, if he bought R2D2, he could easily sell R2D2 later on eBay for millions of dollars in Latinum (I know, I know: a Star Trek reference. Sorry, {other} nerds.), and then he could probably buy the company that makes this LG Spectrum phone!

Man, this salesman is probably dissing on R2D2 so he can buy him for himself! But R2D2 doesn’t know that, so he’ll most likely shock him with his high-voltage appendage and trash the store after this customer leaves! But the joke’s on this salesman anyway: for little does he realize it, but R2D2 always comes with a C3PO unit, and that means you get followed around everywhere by some wise-ass hyper-critical blame-game-playing douche-bag complainer robot with an annoyingly stuffy British accent all the time: and all of those irritating quips will most likely get the salesman beaten up and picked on all the time. Plus, jocks will always give him wedgies for having Star Wars droids hanging around with him wherever he goes. But after all, it serves him right for insulting R2D2, gypping the customer out of choosing R2D2, and using a Star Wars droid as a comparison product for a smartphone to begin with, because that’s just silly and dishonest! (But fun for this ad! Although when they do a comparison like this, where they compare something against something else that's a completely different kind of thing, it makes it look like they're afraid to put their product up against the competition, doesn't it?)

Here’s the sneaky salesman’s scurrilous Star Wars scam spot: