President Obama said today he'd work with anyone on climate change. And I said: "Really? Even Pollutey the Poisonman?" Well, if you don't know, Pollutey the Poisonman is a real character (I made up) who, while not actually "real", represents the spirit of the current pollution environment situation, just like Frosty the Snowman represents the spirit of Christmas. And so here's a proposed song for the probably-not-upcoming cartoon TV special for children about Pollutey the Poisonman (after all, the kids ought to all know who Pollutey is, because they're the ones who will have to live in the world polluted by his handiwork when they grow up and have kids of their own; but it's yucky and depressing, so nobody will make the show, I'll bet):
(Sort of) To the tune of "Frosty the Snowman":
Pollutey the Poisonman loves to poison everything,
He poisons people when they go outside in the Winter, Fall, Summer and Spring.
He always just digs holes to pour his toxic slop in,
And he hires lobbying whores so the EPA can't catch nor stop him.
Pollutey the Poisonman gets away with everything,
Lots of money to politician friends makes sure no crimes can him sting.
