I was reading a blog post about the Abu Ghraib scandal, and it reminded me of an idea I had for a sketch comedy piece I wrote years ago but never made (I have hundreds of these sketches lying around). It was for a fake commercial advertising a special, joke “G. I. Joe, Abu Ghraib: Torture & Humiliation Unit” doll. He would come with hand-cuffs, duct tape, rope, dildo and digital camera. (Detainees sold separately.) And the ad would show a couple of American kids stripping a detainee doll and slapping him around with the G. I. Joe doll, saying stuff like: “You better tell us, Achmed, or it’s the human pyramid for you!” And then they put him in a compromising position with another naked detainee doll, and they say: “Smile for the camera!”, and: "Say cheese!" and stuff. And they show the doll using the toy digital camera. Oh, yes, and I almost forgot: there is a “G. I. Jane, Abu Ghraib” with “thumbs up thumbs” and "pointy fingers" for posing for photographs with detainees. (It’s kind of like a new-fangled “Kung Fu grip”.) But she is, I'm afraid, sold separately, as there is no co-ed packaging permitted in the toy military.
Then, when they get tired of humiliating terrorism-suspect detainees, they can capture and torture the guys from Cobra. After all, they’re super-villains, and they probably deserve it.
