At the Newark airport on Monday, I noticed there was a bar with a French theme called: “Le Grand Comptoir”. The place seemed really nice, with friendly staff, a nice, relaxing atmosphere, and good food & drinks. But if this place has a French theme, and they’re dealing with Americans all the time, shouldn’t it have a more snooty, look-down-their-nose-at-you attitude, since we are all, after all, the “ugly Americans” to them. And even if the employees aren’t actually French, surely they’re supposed to make a token effort to at least try to replicate the true French experience for Americans, right? So that’s why I think they should have called the French-themed place “Le Grand Contempt”. Then, the people who worked there could look down their noses at you and criticize and insult everything about your order, your appearance, your style, your behavior, and your speech. And whatever you said, they should try to find something to criticize about it. Oh, and if, God forbid, you ever even have the gumption to attempt to communicate with them in French, like when ordering stuff from a menu that is all written entirely in French, they should just roll their eyes in disgust when they hear your pronunciation, give you an expression of absolute contemptuous loathing, and snidely correct your grammar while refusing to serve you after mangling their mother tongue. Then if they can’t get you to leave of your own accord due to their horribly insultingly condescending attitude, they simply spill some messy food dish into your lap, etc., until they drive you out of the place.
Now that would be an authentic French experience for an average American!
