I was watching CNN’s coverage of President Obama’s speech about the Afghanistan War drawdown, and Peter Bergen was on to offer his analysis. But I could hardly even begin to pay attention to what he was saying, because he had this ridiculous-looking “bob” haircut down over his ears that made him look like the singer for INXS or Duran Duran or something. I heard the original singer from INXS has died, so perhaps Mr. Bergen is growing his hair out so he can audition to replace him in the band. Or maybe he plays in an ‘80s cover band, and they have to look all authentic, with lame haircuts and awful-looking clothes or something. But even so, it’s inappropriate to have such a dumb hairstyle when your primary job is to be a military analyst or a Middle East expert (especially at his age!), because it’s so distracting to have everyone around you, including yourself, laughing the whole time he’s talking; and it’s impossible to hear him through it all, too.
Now, I’m not the kind of person who usually criticizes the way people look or dress or anything like that. Do what you want: I don’t care. But when you dress in certain ways, it’s just the traditions or prejudices in our society that make them seem out-of-place for doing certain jobs. For example, you wouldn’t expect to see a Starbuck's barista wearing a football uniform, and you might not even know to ask them to take your order; and you wouldn’t feel comfortable investing your money with a banker wearing a Speedo weenie-bikini and flip-flops at the office, right? And what about if you went to see a doctor, and he or she was dressed as a police officer; would you trust that person to perform your delicate life-saving procedure? Or more to the point, would you let a doctor operate on you if he had a Mohawk, or would you let an attorney litigate a case for you if he had a dyed-green mullet? No? Well, then it’s also inappropriate to have a retro music hairstyle from A Flock of Seagulls when you’re doing terrorism- and war-related analysis for “The Most Trusted Name in News”. Seriously, the “bob” haircut he had was as blatant an ‘80s music reference as if he were wearing a Mohawk haircut, and it looked just as ridiculous too (especially in a suit)!
So, Mr. Bergen: You don’t see Anderson Cooper with spiky dyed hair, you don’t see Rachel Maddow with a bleached Mohawk like Wendy O. Williams, and you don’t see Sean Hannity with a 3 Stooges “Moe” haircut (as appropriate as you might feel it would be), do you? And you don't see Charles Krauthammer with cornrows, so please, get a news analyst haircut (which I guess would be a bald comb-over), or just do your interviews over the phone. After all, you could do radio with silly hair like yours; but on television, it’s simply too jarringly incompatible with what you’re talking about, and it just produces too many unintended and unnecessary giggles and comments/criticism: and that’s distracting! And oh, yes: it undermines your credibility, in addition to being a bad style-choice for people over 45, and clashing with your suit.
So, Mr. Bergen: You don’t see Anderson Cooper with spiky dyed hair, you don’t see Rachel Maddow with a bleached Mohawk like Wendy O. Williams, and you don’t see Sean Hannity with a 3 Stooges “Moe” haircut (as appropriate as you might feel it would be), do you? And you don't see Charles Krauthammer with cornrows, so please, get a news analyst haircut (which I guess would be a bald comb-over), or just do your interviews over the phone. After all, you could do radio with silly hair like yours; but on television, it’s simply too jarringly incompatible with what you’re talking about, and it just produces too many unintended and unnecessary giggles and comments/criticism: and that’s distracting! And oh, yes: it undermines your credibility, in addition to being a bad style-choice for people over 45, and clashing with your suit.
(BTW: I was looking for a picture of Peter Bergen to post here, but I can’t find one that looks like he did today. If you do a search of Google Images for “Peter Bergen”, you’ll see some of him with silly, pretentious haircuts; but today he just had that perfectly-awful “just in-between” having long and short hair that looks so bad on men. But this is obviously the way he likes his hair, even at his age and with his job requiring credibility and authority (!). So you go, girl! (I guess…) After all, people who criticize other people’s fashion choices are real jerks, and that’s why I’m doing it. But actually, I am only joking, so I hope you won’t get mad.)
P.S.: Peter Bergen has a normal haircut nowadays, meaning late 2013.
P.S.: Peter Bergen has a normal haircut nowadays, meaning late 2013.
