Thursday, June 21, 2012

Romney and Red Tape

Today, Mitt Romney gave a speech somewhere claiming too many American families are wrapped-up in red tape. But doesn't that sound kind of fun, when you visualize that image in your head? After all, red tape is so festive and Christmasy! You can tie it into pretty little bows wrapped around gift boxes and such, and it makes them look so much more celebratory, don't you think? (Martha Stewart could make so much out of it, I'll bet.)

In fact, is that what's really going on here? Is this a new front in the "War on Christmas"? Is Mitt Romney trying to ruin Christmas for everyone by mandating boring, generic packaging for gift-wrapping? I knew it! What a hypocrite! Republicans always accuse Democrats of trying to destroy Christmas, then then they do it themselves by trying to ban all that festive red tape! And once it's a fait accompli, he'll probably blame it on President Obama!

I ask you: who can we trust to protect our festive holiday wrapping materials anymore?