A news story today reports creative accounting at the
Pentagon hid lots and lots of wasteful spending, with spending numbers missing
all over the place to hide their waste, fraud and abuse. Well, there’s only one
thing to do here, isn’t there? We’ve got to design a new type of weapon that
can destroy debts! We’ve got the most advanced, powerful military in the world,
so I know we can do it, if we just pour enough resources into it and let them
spend it however they want. (Hey, I trust them, don’t you?)
Now, I used to joke on this very blog about how the Pentagon
ought to simply threaten the world with their military might into paying
whatever budget they want, making it into a big protection racket. But hey, if
they’re so smart, why can’t they develop bombs and missiles that can eradicate
debt? Then we could just drop them on our national debt and make it disappear!
(Of course, we’d tow the debt on a barge into the pacific for the bomb test,
like with the H-Bomb stuff: I’m not crazy, you know! And even if it doesn’t
really work, we could just say it does, and see if anyone wants the
consequences of contradicting our military, which would necessarily be severe,
so you don’t really want to know what it would be.)
So come on military: If you’re so tough, then “waste” the
waste! Then we’ll all be solvent again! (And anyone who disagrees can be shot
for treason.) Might not only makes right, it also can intimidate us into
prosperity! (Can’t it?)
Here’s the story:
(Actually, the truth is that this Reuters story was removed
from Google, so someone pointed me to the webcache, which is likely going to be
gone soon too. So maybe the Pentagon has already designed a news
story-destroying weapon? Well, then we’re on the right track! Just make it hone
in on debt rather than unfavorable news, and it will work like a charm! Then we’ll
all be rich again!)
