Yes, supposedly Harrison Ford is returning for a new Star
Wars movie to play a geriatric Han Solo.
But is this really a good idea? I think if he’s going to return, we need them all to come back (wherever possible). Let’s have an old
gray Chewbacca the wookie, an out-of-shape Princess Leia, a fat, bald,
midlife-crisis Luke Skywalker, the whole shebang! (Luke Skywalker could have
some flashy red midlife-crisis-mobile Ferrari speeder, a toupée that constantly gets blown
off his head when he drives, and he could try to use the Force to pick up
younger women in cantinas, but fail when they ask: “Hey, didn’t you save the
galaxy like 35 years ago? What have you done since then?”) That way we won’t all feel so bad about how we turned out since we went to see the very first Star
Wars movie in the theaters back in 1977.
(You were all alive then, right?)
