Scientology "The Hobbit" Tie-In Ad?

The Super Bowl had a big flashy Scientology ad in it this year. I guess that's to try to stem the tide of bad press from the numerous newspaper and magazine articles about them lately. And while there are plenty of claims against them, I have also heard some good things, like that they can help people realize their full potential. (I have no direct experience with Scientology myself, but I have known a couple of successful followers who spoke highly of their self-realization stuff. Kind of seems like a cult to me, though.) And this new Super Bowl ad was all slick and stuff, but did it really connect with people?

Well, I believe I may have an idea for them to connect with more people, and that's by tying Scientology in with The Hobbit movies. Here's how it would work: Frodo and Bilbo Baggins could both say that they achieved Middle Earth-shattering accomplishments they never thought possible, and which helped all the peoples of Middle Earth, by becoming Scientologists. And then they could introduce us to "Elrond Hubbard", the elven founder of Scientology, and he could take us for a little tour through Rivendell (the Middle Earth Scientology headquarters), and tell us that even a wimpy little hobbit can realize greatness through Dianetics. And he could reveal that the volcano on the cover of the book Dianetics is actually Mount Doom from The Lord of the Rings, symbolizing Frodo's accomplishments which rid the world of Sauron, and that these books are true histories of what happened when little hobbits joined Scientology: they saved the world.