Spiriva is still making ads showing elephants crushing old people with COPD by sitting on them. At first I thought this was a proxy war by Democrats to besmirch Republicans by showing the Republican mascot (an elephant) crushing and oppressing old people. Oh, but now I see the true nefarious plan!
This is PeTA who is behind this ad! They're showing ads which depict elephants as mean-spirited animals who like to sit on defenseless people, and this will rile our notoriously reactionary populace up against them! And then we will see vigilantes hunting down captive elephants and attacking them in revenge for what the elephants (allegedly) do to COPD sufferers in the Spiriva ads.
Oh, but this is exactly what PeTA wants to see happen! Because only then can they provide numerous simultaneous reports of elephant abuse! Animals rights groups just had to pay a huge settlement to Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus ($9.3 Million), and they didn't even save any elephants (!). But if PeTA can pull this off through their obvious bait & switch Spiriva ads, they can demonstrate how elephants are threatened by the populace at large, and how even the circus elephants might become targets, with people assuming they are hired out by the circus to sit on old people. And then they could get all the captive elephants free from their day jobs: Hooray!
Oh, but then we'd have record elephant unemployment in America, and elephants would have no choice but to work for the Republican Party as mascots. And once they get used to working for Republicans, they might be deployed to go sit on high-profile Democrats like Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi (!!). So I hope you all see now the unintended consequences of the policies of groups like these!
(I hope you all realize this is only a silly joke.)
Here's the Spiriva spot:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PyZerO8E24
And here's the ASPCA settlement story:
http://finance.yahoo.com/news/aspca-pays-9-3-million-144200798.html
