Escape from New York Countdown Watch (Joke Ad)

In seeing Escape from New York again on TCM, I couldn’t help but notice the huge digital watch Kurt Russell wears to count down the time he has left before the little explosive charges in his carotid arteries detonate and kill him. But digital watches like that are not nearly so desirable “in the future” as they were in 1981. I’m surprised he didn’t tell Lee Van Cleef: “A digital watch? I’m not going in there with this stupid-looking watch.” And Lee Van Cleef would say: “You have to go, we need you to save the president, and those capsules will detonate in 22 hours if you don’t, and you’ll die.” To which Kurt Russell would reply: “I’ll die of embarrassment if I have to wear this f*cking digital watch! Everyone’s going to make fun of me with this big glowing digital watch, and I’ll never find the president! I won’t do it unless you get me a better watch; like a Movado, or a Rolex.” And Lee Van Cleef would say: “Are you serious? New York is a maximum security prison filled with the most hardened criminals in the country; they’d kill you and cut off your hand for a watch like a Rolex or a Movado!” And Kurt Russell would say (smugly): “I don’t care. If I don’t get a cool watch, you’ll have to get someone else, or do it yourself.” And then the whole thing could be an ad for Movado, Rolex, or some high-end watch store, with the announcer saying: “That’s the power of a nice watch! So next time get a Rolex (or Movado), or you’ll never save the president in time!”