There’s an internet ad that poses the query: “Why are big razor companies afraid of this man?” I shall attempt to solve this mystery by deductive reasoning so I don’t have to click on the ad. Here goes:
I don’t know why they’re afraid of that man, but I think it’s a good bet that he’s a werewolf. You see, stainless steel blades can’t kill a werewolf; you have to use sterling silver. It would be prohibitively expensive for a big razor company to make their razors out of silver, so they don’t. And knowing they don’t have silver blades, obviously the werewolf guy is targeting them, because he knows they can’t harm him. Plus, as a werewolf, he likely takes it personally about the shaving industry pressuring people into shaving, assuming they are insulting him because he’s hairy, so he’s offended and he wants revenge. (It’s the only thing that makes sense for why big razor companies would be afraid of one man, because if he’s not a werewolf, they can just shred him with their deadly razor blades and dispose of his body as mulch, and likely nobody would ever suspect what happened.)
Of course, it would help to know if the companies are large corporations that make normal razors, or if they are, in fact, small or moderately-sized companies that make large, Claes Oldenburg-sized razors. That might help us to understand the question better. And if it’s the latter, it would likely be someone from the government scaring the companies, saying they’re not allowed to make enormous razors because they could fall and kill people, and the companies are afraid of going out of business due to safety regulations.
Well, I hope I have cleared up this conundrum everyone was puzzled over.
Here are some examples of Claes Oldenburg sculptures:
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