Senator Menendez, in his criticism of Senator Chuck
Grassley’s concerns over the current version of the immigration reform bill,
claimed on MSNBC today that Sen. Grassley would reject the bill no matter what,
saying: “…if ten angels came swearing from above that this was the best reform
bill for America’s security, prosperity, and to preserve our history as a
nation of immigrants, he would say ‘no’.” But is this a fair claim? Actually,
Senator Grassley would have no choice but to say no if angels pushed for this
legislation due to the Separation of Church and State. Is Senator Menendez
suggesting that supernatural religious entities ought to dictate our country’s
immigration policy? Isn’t the Democratic party the one who always objects to
prayer in school and manger scenes on public grounds and other religious stuff
like that? But now they want angels to lobby Congress for policy stuff? Man,
that’s a new one on me! I thought Sen. Grassley was just concerned about
terrorism-related issues and hoped to address those concerns in the bill for the
sake of security, but maybe he just opposes immigration reform no matter what,
just like Senator Menendez says. But then again, maybe this whole thing is just
an opportunity for Senator Menendez to push for divine intervention on the
immigration bill, and then within government policy just generally. And while I always thought
Democrats were against religion in politics, perhaps their public opposition to
it is merely a ruse designed to trick us into not suspecting them when angels
take over the government and subvert the Constitution! (They can’t fool me
though: I was onto them all along! They doth protest too much about religion in
government!)
So to update all you conspiracy fans out there: It’s not
extra-terrestrials who are controlling the government (like in The X Files), it’s angels! They’re trying to horn in on our
political system and hijack the country! Then they can force everyone to go to
church all the time by law! (I know what they’re up to! Religion’s power has waned in America, and
they’re trying to force a comeback! But who ever would have suspected that the Democrats would be behind this conspiracy? {I mean, besides me.})
[I am just being silly here, everyone…]
