After another big 0-0 game (Malaga v. Dortmund), I’ve had
it, and I think it’s time to rethink soccer so it’s not so frustratingly
low-scoring and tedious. So here’s the plan: I call it SuperSoccer, and here’s
how it’s played:
The field is shaped like a big plus sign: a cross, with
equal measurements. The middle is about the size of the middle of
a standard soccer field, with a circle in the center, and with lines around the
outside of it. Then off to each side is a separate part of the field, about
half the length of a standard side, and with a goal in each end. So four teams
play, and they each kick off a white ball at the edge of the center circle,
each worth one point if scored. Then, in the center of the circle is a red ball,
which counts for five points if scored. And then they all have to play a game
of continual triage situations to figure out the risk vs. reward odds at any
given moment over which ball to chase, defend, etc. And with all these balls,
the teams can all gang up on one team, or they can all play against each other,
or they can make secret deals beforehand to help at critical times while
pretending not to (kind of like the TV show Survivor). And everyone will have to decide whether to play
with the white balls or the red one, and many goals may be scored with the
white ones as a result. And with this setup, the score is bound to be pretty
high by the end of it. Hey, at least it won’t be boring!
