Has it really come to this? Honda is actually threatening people to buy Hondas or else they'll send Michael Bolton to torture them by singing inside their non-Honda cars. Wow, think of all the auto-related suicides we'll have: drivers who can't take it anymore driving off cliffs, driving into trees, driving into oncoming traffic! Oh, the humanity! Surely it's not legal to threaten people into buying products so flagrantly like this! Shouldn't the government step in and put a stop to these horrors?
Oh, wait: you mean these ads are showing how Michael Bolton will spontaneously appear and torture you with his crappy singing if you buy a Honda? Wow, Honda's going to lose a lot of customers this way! But for all those who don't buy the Hondas, think of all the lives that will be saved from all the motorist suicides of those subjected to Michael Bolton...
Here's the audio agony auto ad:
http://www.ispot.tv/ad/76If/honda-happy-honda-days-civic-featuring-michael-bolton
You know, if they really want to sell cars, Honda ought to show how if you buy a Honda, you get to choose where Michael Bolton shows up, and give buyers the option to have Michael Bolton show up in the middle of the freeway right in front of the car while they're speeding down the road. Then the Honda drivers could run him over, and they wouldn't even get blamed, since he's in the middle of the freeway, and they couldn't possibly have stopped in time to avoid hitting him. And maybe each driver could choose to do this again and again, day after day, running him over repeatedly. Then Honda would sell lots and lots of cars! And that way, people who like Michael Bolton could listen to his singing and enjoy his presence, and people who can't stand Michael Bolton could enjoy their revenge for years of being subjected to hearing his lame hoarse voice and hackneyed songs all over the place.
Now that I think about it though, this might not work. After all, the police are bound to notice that they are cleaning Michael Bolton off the freeway hundreds, possibly thousands of times per day and realize something is afoot. But then again, maybe they would see the poetic justice and just shrug it off: who knows?
(BTW: Please don't blame me for this idea: after all, Honda is the one threatening us with the horror of Michael Bolton appearing inside and outside of our cars. I couldn't help but think of this silly scenario as a form of psychological self-defense from such horrors.)
(And of course, this is just a silly joke, so no offense, I hope. While I'm not a big fan of Michael Bolton's music, he seems like a nice man, and I'm just being exaggeratedly absurd with this whole reversal of the ad concept.)
