Thursday, December 15, 2011

The Waltons

Have you seen this?:


It says six of The Waltons have more wealth than the bottom 30% of Americans. I’m not sure if they mean from the mid-thigh down on all Americans, or if they mean something else; but it would make sense if it was the legs and feet, as most people have their money in pockets and purses and stuff, and not so much in their shoes and socks. And I guess they’ve gotten this information from looking at the airport scan pictures of us they claim to have deleted. (Once they got bored of looking at us all naked, that is…)

But what if it means The Waltons are richer than 30% of the whole country? Then there’s got to be something going on there! They look poor, but they’re super-rich, and they live in the hills, so it must be drugs! (Or they are secretly The Beverly Hillbillies.) They’re either manufacturing meth, or they’ve got a moonshine empire! And that show is for kids and families! Oh, the outrage…

No wonder they’re always saying “Good night” over and over again to each other: they’re either all drunk or tweaked!

John-Boy, you’ve got some explaining to do, young man!

Here’s the IMDB page for The Waltons: