Mr. Whipple sure got driven crazy by people always trying to
squeeze the Charmin toilet paper and then never buying anything because he
yelled at them and chased them all away. The situation almost bankrupted poor
Mr. Whipple’s store. In fact, things got so bad that he had to take drastic
action: he planted homemade bombs inside the Charmin so that whenever anyone
squeezed it, it would explode (!!). Well, that injured several shoppers and
attracted the attention of Homeland Security, after which Mr. Whipple was taken
away in handcuffs and never heard from again, although I have it on good
authority that he’s in Supermax. And that’s why Mr. Whipple disappeared from
the Charmin ads. Or at least that’s what I heard from those Charmin bears. (But
who knows: maybe they ate him!)
Here are some examples of the old Mr. Whipple Charmin ads
demonstrating Mr. Whipple’s conundrum:
