In this commercial for TD Ameritrade retirement stuff, we see a man standing on a girder from some skyscraper construction, and the announcer says: “At his current pace, Bob will retire when he’s 153, which would be fine, if Bob were a vampire, but he’s not.” Oh, but if Bob’s not a vampire, then how come he’s wearing a vampire outfit and flying from the skyscraper into a moldering old castle?
And even after they say he’s not a vampire, he still walks through his own front door dressed as a vampire, and his family doesn’t seem to think anything is amiss. So then it’s obvious that Bob is a vampire, and TD Ameritrade is just trying to help him drink all of our blood (!). (And so now it finally makes sense why Bob is standing on a skyscraper girder after sunset! {A-Ha!})
And even after they say he’s not a vampire, he still walks through his own front door dressed as a vampire, and his family doesn’t seem to think anything is amiss. So then it’s obvious that Bob is a vampire, and TD Ameritrade is just trying to help him drink all of our blood (!). (And so now it finally makes sense why Bob is standing on a skyscraper girder after sunset! {A-Ha!})
Shame on you guys at TD Ameritrade: It makes calling investment banks “bloodsuckers” take on a whole new meaning!
Here’s the blood-slurping spot: